There are many psychologists, counselors and therapists trained to do individual counseling. Some decide to expand their client base by branching off into offering marriage counseling or couple’s counseling. These are not normally the people you want to choose if you want help with your relationship. You want trained, licensed people who specialize in marriage […]
Here are 18 signs that it is time to consider ending a relationship: You consistently don’t feel heard. You are more attached to the way you wish your partner would be rather than the way your partner actually is. You are continuously looking for your partner to change, and if things remain the way they […]
If you were to give yourself a grade for how effective, how responsive and how loving you behave in your relationship, what would that grade be? Better yet, break the above question down into smaller segments. On an A B C D F scale, using (+) or (–) to more fully adjust your grade, what […]
Dear Neil: You recently reprinted a letter from a woman who was wondering why she and her husband were no longer having sex. Of all the reasons you offered about why couples quit having sex, you ignored the issue of being physically limited. My husband was diagnosed with diabetes. Despite our best efforts and modern […]
When I feel criticized, I withdraw or attack back. How can I change this?
Does this happen in your relationship? One person (let’s say it’s you) makes a request of your intimate partner. Maybe you want help with cleaning or straightening up the house. Perhaps you feel your partner is following the car in front of you on the highway too closely, and want him/her to back off a […]
Dear Neil: My husband left me 4 weeks ago. We have been married for 2 years, together for 4, and have 2 children, ages 4 and 2. I was pregnant when we met, and am now 27 (he is 24). We have been fighting a lot, and he is often angry at me. Frequently he […]
Dear Neil: Everything seems to point to the fact that my 30 year marriage is dead and I should leave my husband. But I keep thinking that something will happen and everything will change. About 10 years ago, he received a sizable inheritance, and from then on things started to change. He became secretive, controlling […]
Dear Neil: My ex-husband of 26 years, and the father of our two teenage boys, had been distant, withdrawn and angry with me for 3 years before he told me he was moving out. He said he had been miserable in our marriage for years. He also had developed a “friendship” with a younger female […]
Dear Neil: I have dated a guy for 6 months. I’m 38; he’s 60.When we first got together, I told him I didn’t want my heart broken. He said: “I’m not the heartbreaking type. I’m usually on the other end of that.” He wanted to be exclusive early on, and suggested that we spend our […]