Dear Neil: My boyfriend and I haven’t been together for very long. We fell in love very fast, and have suffered a miscarriage. Since then he has become more obsessed with his autonomy and having space, and he has been emotionally distant. He is yet to be divorced (he’s taking his time), and I found […]
All Fluff, No Substance Dear Neil: A year ago I connected with a woman who was gorgeous, warm and affectionate. She was a model type, very striking in appearance. She appeared to be quite taken by me, and I had visions of this being THE ONE. But a couple of months into the relationship, she […]
In my 28 year practice as a marriage and family therapist, perhaps the most unexpected discovery I’ve made is related to how hard it is for full fledged adults to create and maintain a healthy, positive intimate relationship over time. I have always thought that if you were a single adult over 40 and looking […]
Dear Neil: I am in a four month relationship with a man who has proposed to me. We are both 26. I want to get married and have a baby, and I am leaning toward accepting his proposal. But I am getting a lot of flack from my parents and others in my family saying […]
Most satisfied couples will tell you that friendship is the most important ingredient in their relationship. Think for a moment of a person that you would call a good friend–someone other than your partner–and see how many of the following statements apply to that relationship. Put a check mark beside the statement if it applies. […]
May Not Be Worth It Dear Neil: I’ve been involved in a relationship with a woman who is 25, and has a three year old daughter. In the span of our relationship she has flip-flopped back and forth on a decision of whether to be in a relationship with me. Today she could be talking […]
Dear Neil: I got out of a ten year relationship, and five months later got into another one. After four months, I decided to take a chance and we moved in together. I have three children, two of which are teenagers, and there are expenses, house cleaning chores and cooking needs—none of which my new […]
Dear Neil: Almost universally you’ll hear women say they want a guy with a “good sense of humor.” What exactly does that mean? Am I supposed to be cracking jokes all day long? I tend to be on the serious side. What am I supposed to do? Not Understanding in Longmont, Colorado Dear Not Understanding: […]
Dear Neil: I’m having much difficulty in believing my sick significant other. When we dated, he told me all about his past problems with drugs and alcohol. I was given to understand that he’d been in recovery for years. He moved in with me last year, and I immediately learned he was using pain killers […]
Dear Neil: What makes a person—namely a man—become emotionally unavailable? Why do men seem to value being emotionally available far less than women? What are some things a man could do to overcome being emotionally unavailable? Hurt in New York Dear Hurt: I get so many questions from readers about this subject that repeating some […]