Dear Neil: Things seemed to be going well on the intimacy front with my boyfriend of six months. Then he hurt his back and had two weeks of intense back spasms. It was totally understandable that our sex life took a break during that time, and that he needed time afterword to regain energy. However, […]
Does a long-term exclusive relationship deaden sexual desire? Does being with the same sexual partner year in and year out lead to feelings of monotony? Do closeness and intimacy lead to good sex, or do people have the best sex during dating, courtship and/or early marriage? Perhaps you have some experience that no matter how […]
Dear Neil: I’ve been involved with a man for the past several months who seems to have trouble sustaining erotic arousal with me. I’m 25 and still a virgin. He’s 31 and experienced. We have an amazingly intense emotional connection. I know he finds me physically attractive and thinks very highly of me, and yet […]
Dear Neil: My husband and I were married at a very young age—he was 21 and I was 19. We’ve now been married 25 years and have successfully raised a loving family. We are currently empty nesters in our mid-forties. In the past 2 years our jobs have changed and we both are working from […]
Dear Neil: This year I started college and met this wonderful boy, who I will call “Sam.” He has been going out with his girlfriend for a year, and he and I have been sleeping with each other for the last 5 months. A month into this secret relationship (nobody could know because he had […]
Dear Neil: My wife and I are married twenty-five years, but we are no longer sexual, and haven’t been for three years. I guess you could say we have a celibate marriage, but I don’t understand why. We were always frisky with each other, but it slowly lessened until there was nothing at all. Why does […]
Dear Neil: What is it about being married that takes all the erotic juice out of a relationship? I’ve been married twice, once for 15 years and the other for 20. I’ve noticed a gradual wearing down of romance that happened to both. The relationship starts out hot, romantic and loving—but work, stress, taking care […]
Dear Neil: Given that you are a marriage and family therapist, I am surprised that you seem to know so little about post-menopausal women. Western post-menopausal women—due to stressful lives, bad diet and lack of exercise—end up with endocrine degeneration, which in turn leads to a significant loss of sexual urge. Foreplay doesn’t work, and […]
Dear Neil: From my own experience, I have become aware that achieving orgasm during intercourse is difficult for many women—and frequently results in disappointment and disillusionment. Instead of an expression of mutual love, it becomes an act of service or duty for the woman, who afterwards must contain her unrelieved sexual tension. After 27 years […]
Dear Neil: I want your advise on whether my boyfriend is bisexual. Here are the facts. I found a book in his room titled “How To Make Love To A Man.” He likes to watch gay porn, tells me about rape fantasies with other men and buys gay porn. He always wants to have anal […]