Dear Neil: My husband and I split up six years ago after 29 years of marriage. He is still with the woman he left me for, but I am finding it impossible to let go of the relationship and move on. There has not been anyone new since then either. Any suggestions? He’s No Longer […]
Dear Neil: My 25 year marriage ended over 3 years ago. One night my ex-husband forgot to log out of an e-mail account, and I discovered he had an affair with someone he met on Craigslist, had profiles on several adultery dating sites (married man looking for casual sex), and had created his own porn […]
How do you say goodbye to a dream? More specifically, how do you say goodbye to a person who you once viewed as your dream—your dream romantic partner, spouse, lover or soul mate? If you are having trouble letting go of your attachment to an ex-romantic partner, somebody who you once may have loved dearly […]
Dear Neil: Could you address the subject of forgiveness? Although I know what it means to forgive, I’m baffled by how to do it. My wife abruptly dumped me for another guy, and I feel extremely hurt, rejected and humiliated. I really cared about her, supported her, was good to her and I loved her, […]
The recent articles printed in these pages about trauma and how people recover have generated dozens of readers writing in to share their stories of loss and their search for recovery. Some people are dealing with the loss of their home in one of the recent devastating fires, some may be injured—or have lost a […]
Dear Neil: How do I get over an ex that I am still in love with? I was in a relationship with a woman for about two years before we broke up. We have tried to remain friends, and we meet for coffee from time to time. I am still in love with her, but […]
Note: This is the second of a two-part series. This is a continuation of the questions designed to assist you in learning the lessons from a relationship ending. These questions come from Karen Kahn Wilson in her book Transformational Divorce (New Harbinger Publications): How did you handle the differences between you and your ex? Differences […]
Note: This is the first of a two-part series. Dear Neil: I am ending a 25 year marriage with a man I have spent my entire adult life with. I wanted to be a stay at home Mom, but because he couldn’t keep a job, I had to work most of those years. I have […]
So your relationship didn’t work out the way you had hoped, and you and your intimate partner have now broken up. How many adults can say that they’ve been through at least one intimate love relationship that didn’t stand the test of time? If you have recently ended a relationship, or if you are currently […]
The following is a continuation of the reasons (or excuses) people often give when breaking up, and explanation of what those reasons mean—and what, if anything, you can do about it. What Is Said: “You’re not the person I married.” What It Really Means: It’s probably true. None of us stay the same over time: […]