Want to put some spice, zing, spark and pizazz back into your relationship? Try being more romantic. Romance is not about elaborate gifts or surprises, although elaborate gifts can be romantic. Romance is about doing the little sweet things for someone else, which can include unasked for and surprise gifts. Surprise gifts are cherished. The […]
Guarded Heart
Being willing to risk hurt is key to deepening a relationship Dear Neil: I am an attractive, single professional woman in my early 40’s. I have a good figure, no children. I have been divorced for ten years and have dated a lot of different men. So why am I still single? My relationships with […]
Repeating the Familiar
Parent’s Marriage Becomes The Role Model for Their Children’s Marriages Dear Neil: I am sorry to report that my marriage was as dysfunctional as any. My husband used to bad mouth me in front of the children, and after we had been married seventeen years, I started cheating on him. My daughter figured it out. […]
Too Close for Comfort
Dear Neil: The two year relationship I had with my girlfriend ended a few months ago. While at college, we were best friends and lovers. But after graduation, she decided to move back to her home town. It was then she began withdrawing emotionally and cutting herself off from me. She held all of her […]
A Sexual Guide for the Very Experienced
NOTE: THIS IS THE SECOND OF A TWO PART SERIES Especially if you have been married for a long period of time—or if you’ve been in many relationships through the years—this column is designed as a primer on how to keep the sexual spark alive and vital. Sex doesn’t stay vital in a long-range relationship […]
Women and Sex
Dear Neil: What is it that blocks me from having sex with my husband of twenty-four years? Probably anger—at the years of belittling, unkind verbal responses, lack of empathy, lack of interest in my concerns, long periods of unresponsive silence, disregard for my personhood, outbursts of inappropriate anger, repeated acts of aggression and hatred. The […]
Breaking Up Requires Effective Closure
Dear Neil: I was in a two year relationship with a fifty year old man who asked me to marry him. But Bob had both second thoughts and anxiety attacks, and eventually he ended the relationship saying: “I don’t want to talk anymore, and I don’t have to tell you why I don’t want to […]
Withholding Sex as a Weapon
Differing sexual appetites is often the nature of romance and marriage. But if your mate is angry with you, or if he/she wants to fight, distance or control you, then withholding sex may be the most powerful way to get your attention. Withholding sex—or using sex as a weapon—is used in many intimate relationships to […]
Wife not enjoying sex…
Dear Neil: The frequency of sex is the major problem in our thirty year marriage. My wife has always had problems with her enjoyment of sex, despite long-term and determined efforts on my part to please her. I have tried music, presents, clothes, gifts, flowers, planning holidays, praise, acceptance, viewing sexy videos together, reading books, […]
How Frequently Do Women Have Sex in Order to Please Men?
That question brought responses from women around the world. Listen to the various ways women view the subject and justify their feelings. “I don’t think anyone should ever have to have sex in order please their partner,” says K.A.P., Amarillo, Texas. “I had sex in order to please my husband most of the time. But […]