There is Another Way Terry Dodson tells a story of learning about handling and resolving conflict. Because of space limitations, I’ve had to edit his tale to its essence. “The train clanked and rattled through the suburbs of Tokyo on a drowsy spring afternoon. At one station, the doors opened and suddenly the afternoon quiet […]
Recovering From Infidelity
“I have been living apart from my husband of thirty years, after I discovered (that he had been having) an affair with another woman. Sadly, he continued to deceive me during this time,” writes Anna B. from Christchurch, New Zealand. “I am having great difficulty coping with the fact that I was deceived so badly, […]
Being Faithful is a Decision
“I have been having an affair for eight years. I am scared to death of the prospect of being caught, but that doesn’t stop me,” writes a reader from Denver. “Every few months, I resolve to stop this affair, until my life becomes consumed with my need for sex, affection and attention.” “I have pleaded […]
Student Husband, Student Wife
“I used to think I had no problem with intimacy because I could have sex so easily. I can see now that I used sex as a tool to validate my self-worth. I have been married for 15 years and have never had any intimacy. Can a 42-year-old person learn intimacy?” Wanting in Denver, Colorado Dear […]
Repairing Deceptive and Disloyal Behavior
Dear Neil: I recently learned that my husband had an affair during the six years we were engaged and living together. This affair only ended when I discovered it. During this time (all) our friends, co-workers, bosses (we were employed at the same location), and his family knew about it and covered for him. She […]
Solving Premature Ejaculation
Premature ejaculation is like any other habit. It is hard to stop. Breaking the habit is going to require your ever present, conscious vigilance. Even if you have been sexually active a long time, you are going to have to gain a heightened appreciation for what the exact sensations are immediately before you go over […]
Why Would a Bimbo Try to Destroy my Family?
Dear Neil: (Recently) my husband confessed that he’d been having an affair the past nine months with a married woman. She has (also) confessed that she planned to get this affair going because she wanted a new husband. We have decided that after 38 years together—four grown, well-educated and decent children—six grandchildren and a […]
Controlling Behavior Hurts Intimacy
“I am living with a woman who is very controlling,” writes Craig G. from Miami. “When I don’t agree with her or do things the way she wants me to, she gets furious at me, threatens to have an affair, screams, pouts and withdraws sex. Why does she do this?” How do you attempt to […]
Styles of Love
Listed below are six different styles, or way of loving, from the Love Attitude Scale by Claude and Susan Hendrick. You may embody more than one of these styles. You also may change styles with time and circumstances. All are valid styles that reflect different attitudes about love. What is your style? Eros My partner […]
Perfect Lovers
If someone were given instructions about how to seduce you, could you describe what they would do in order to seduce you perfectly, the exact way you’d like. Do this interesting exercise together as a couple. Ask each other the above question, and allow yourself to be taught how to be a better lover. For […]